I've been trying to put my finger on this unsettling feeling I got going on today. This video just about captures it.
Neither here nor there, nor up or down.
"Q" says that it represents my total non-attachment. I am unto myself alone, allowing myself to float in the zero gravity of reality. Never to land again. My relationships were "taken" so that I would have no reason to stay.
Now, I do know a lot of people but I've also moved a lot so we have lost track of each other. When I came back to Aztec I just became a hermit to sort things out. And in this town that is sort of an odd thing to do. My family has an ice cream shop that my father built to keep my mother busy and it's still going strong 35 years later. EVERYONE in this county knows it. If I meet someone new all I have to do is mention the Vanilla Moose and their eyes roll back in their head as they remember hot chocolate. I'm immediately given a pass. I could probably end up mayor if I played it right. LOL
"Q" says that my parallel life would have been to stay married, be a Cookie Grandma and go to all the grandkids's basketball games since I would have stayed in Indiana where my husband was THE county basket ball star of 1965. In some parallel universe there is a Beth that hosted a Christmas for about 30 people yesterday. If my husband hadn't beat me up I probably would have stayed. I would not have known of the life I didn't have that I'm having now. My life would have been out of "Hoosiers".
Usually "Q" gives me a hint as to the direction I'm supposed to go next.
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